Uniform checking a form of sexual harassment?

- Anchita Thiagrajan and Chunmithra CV

I write about a lot of things, from gender discrimination, mental health awareness to the discrimination based on sexual orientation. And on a daily basis I do get threats, harassed and even some extremely graphic rape threats.

But the one topic which made me receive the most threats was when I talked about sexual harassment in school. I also was a part of that community for a long time. I also liked to think that school was a safe space for the kids. But I realised sooner than others that it was just a mere facade. In the name of protecting the kids from the “exposure” of the sexual urges.

From teachers checking the skirt hem length in class 4 to being slut-shamed by the same teacher in 8th class for being friends with guys. Casual sexism has permeated into our education institution so deeply that no one seems to care.

We have been constantly told to hide the fact that we have boobs, wear the tightest bras that by the time the school finishes there are bruises on our skin. We are told to be hush about the fact that we get a period and mocked by even the teacher if by chance we get a stain on our skirts. Teaching about sex is a far goal to achieve when we can't even acknowledge simple facts that we own a few parts of our body. We have been constantly shamed for having a body to an extent that we start feeling insecure about ourselves. And when we grow up, we are constantly told that we are insecure because we want attention and that we have nothing to really be insecure about. And the most crapped fact is that no one really notices this

We constantly get cat called or be the receiver of unsolicited comments and photos that we no longer consider them as sexual harassment. We give it another fancy term and categorise it to be not sexual harassment. It all stems from the fact that when we were kids, we were taught that slut-shaming for the choices we make was our fault and that it was not of the person who called us with derogatory terms.

It turns out more than 70% of students in the school have been slut-shamed and it didn't stop there. Their whole family was shamed for allowing the child to make decisions about their own body. 

Sexual harassment no only has a short term effect of self loath and crying, rather a long term effect of self-hate, depression, OCD, trust issues and deep insecurities which all stems from a series of harassment by the teacher in school.

So the question raises, though sexual harassment is illegal for decades now, and the cost to be paid by the individual or the company is enormous, why does it keep happening in the society and no one really seems to care about it until a “nirbhaya” happens?

Well, what the research states is that sexual harassment is more inclined to occur in an organisation with the following three characteristics:

• Male-dominated

• Super hierarchical 

• And forgiving of bad behaviour

Guess which organisation has them all? SCHOOLS! Well even though 54% of principal in public schools are female, they are also the pillars of such sexual harassment and encourage their staff to practise this under the facade of “this will be good for them in the long run” or “we are just trying to protect them”. 

The concept that they do not understand is that by blaming the girls for doing a certain activity they are also teaching the guys that blaming the girls is not a wrong thing to do, rather a right thing leading to more “locker room talks”. And these men grow up to be a 40-year-old male on Indian news channel victim-blaming women and asking “why she went out that night to a club” or “what was she wearing tho?”

Gender inequality is both the cause and the consequence of sexual harassment. So basically one cannot really achieve equality, until or unless sexual harassment stops. 

So what can we do to stop sexual harassment?

1. STAND UP. Yes, it is hard to stand up to the teacher who has the power to give you less internals, believe me, I know about that too well to be true. But when your struggle actually results in a change, it's the most beautiful feeling that you can feel.

2. If you are a guy reading this, I first congratulate you because you clicked on this article because you wanted to help. That is the first step, but it's not enough. If you see any man, women, lady, non-binary person harassing a child or even an adult for that matter of fact, stand up and speak up against them. Being a neutral bystander never helps a cause.

3. If you are a girl reading this because this is happening to you or your friends, you have to be more strong. Stay away from toxic friends with an 1800’s mentality. Change your immediate circle and surround yourself with more positive people who stand up against injustices. Being rebellious is contagious, and is needed as of now to change.

4. This one is a long term change that can be aimed for. The one thing that can improve the conditions is none other than SEX EDUCATION. Yup, accepting your own body, the skin in which you are in and being educated about it and the various things that happen in our body not only helps us understand ourselves better, but it also inculcates respect towards what the other person is going through on a hormonal level and helps us understand that all are humans at last.

5. Last but not least- STOP VICTIM BLAMING. The more you promote to change women’s behaviour to prevent rape or sexual harassment, you are really just saying “make sure he rapes or sexually harasses the other girl”. Because there will always be a girl who is less sober, less secure, with fewer friends walking in the dark part of the town. And we want her to be as much as safe as us. 

Sexual harassment has nothing to with the women or the victim and has everything to do with the harasser. period.